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The Musings of Heretic X
22 November 2009 @ 03:18 pm
22 November 2009 @ 02:47 pm
the serpent of the sand knows the wisdom for the wisdom comes from the sand
the kris knife knows not violence; only the one who dances in the blood of it's adversary
the furtherest stiech is the place of sanctuary; on the edge of time and space;
desolation brings forth illumination, illumination brings forth creation
the worms are but a image of us; we devour and we die; we come from nothing and are everything
to say i rule, is but a measure of self; rule me or you, rule or law or nature, to rule is not
wedded to the universe, my consort is chaos and i her liege, passion traverses time and space
to eat under the stars is to eat the wisdom of the great story; to be devoid of food and wisdom is starvation and blindness
does not empire cancel itself out; by it's own cannibalism
the spice doesn't change the man; but man has changed around the spice
water mirrors the universe; so i bathe in the universe even if its sand
no stiech is perfect; but in it's humility brings forth joy
the law of the dune is the law of the universe; the law of man is but folly
call me lord, i renounce, call me count, to 2, call me heretic and we drink unto the last days
death is to be adored; it isn't detestable or deplored; but a key
the kris knife knows not violence; only the one who dances in the blood of it's adversary
the furtherest stiech is the place of sanctuary; on the edge of time and space;
desolation brings forth illumination, illumination brings forth creation
the worms are but a image of us; we devour and we die; we come from nothing and are everything
to say i rule, is but a measure of self; rule me or you, rule or law or nature, to rule is not
wedded to the universe, my consort is chaos and i her liege, passion traverses time and space
to eat under the stars is to eat the wisdom of the great story; to be devoid of food and wisdom is starvation and blindness
does not empire cancel itself out; by it's own cannibalism
the spice doesn't change the man; but man has changed around the spice
water mirrors the universe; so i bathe in the universe even if its sand
no stiech is perfect; but in it's humility brings forth joy
the law of the dune is the law of the universe; the law of man is but folly
call me lord, i renounce, call me count, to 2, call me heretic and we drink unto the last days
death is to be adored; it isn't detestable or deplored; but a key
18 June 2009 @ 07:51 pm
my fellow adepts and sons of light and night; power is intoxicating and also full of folly. power is about duty and humility. if you assume power is a shortcut; than i warn you. and warn you well; it will consume you and your egomania. power is about the self, and also selflessness. using wisdom and decisions either for unity or chaos, or survival. i know power, it is a essence and force that not all can handle. it is like vodka for a drunk, cocaine for the addict, power also has the same effects. power is about responsibility from magick to leadership. it isn't about forcing your will upon others.the fools who wants power will crumble under false pretenses. thus leaves them as and empty vessel of the black lodge.
you have to have to have a sense of duty to use power cohesively, in contrast to hegemons' who use power to further their childish agendas. this isn't why power is given to all adepts and prophets. some who seek power miss that duty is part of the obligation. control requires restraint, and acumen; not emotional instability or psychosis. the aphrodisiac of power makes men into monsters and also power corrupts absolutely. i know cliche'. if we assume power stands alone; your more the fool than the jester.
to be continued
Heretic heX
you have to have to have a sense of duty to use power cohesively, in contrast to hegemons' who use power to further their childish agendas. this isn't why power is given to all adepts and prophets. some who seek power miss that duty is part of the obligation. control requires restraint, and acumen; not emotional instability or psychosis. the aphrodisiac of power makes men into monsters and also power corrupts absolutely. i know cliche'. if we assume power stands alone; your more the fool than the jester.
to be continued
Heretic heX
29 May 2009 @ 08:56 pm
kacching analects
lao said I met him; when I met him, I met myself
Confucius spoke to the bowl;the bowl said confer with the aum of consciousness; Confucius was confused
masterbate a sword, masterbate a pen, masterbate the zen
the bowl is the vessel of the soul; the sword is the food of the soul; stir accordingly
when mr.wong is wrong, you know the truth of the wrong
when mr. Wong is right, you know the wrong of the truth
mr. Wong’s wong is yet both wong and right, that is the hidden truth
lao spoke Tao, Confucius spoke confusion, miyamoto spoke mastery of moto
siddartha is yet dark and sitting and the dark to void’s obscurity
buddha is a bud with dhrana , and laughing with dharma
wear the coat of chaos and the cross of the ashen tau
be the virgin, yet also the scarlet whore, pinkness is the ecsatsy
bittnerness leads to sadness, bitter beer leads to skunking, sadness needeth not bitterness
lust comforts grief, let a sneak thief steal grief away , so laughter can play
ka is the soul of neschema
ching is the algortitms of the soul
but the chariot resides between
kacching
forever lao sits a robe of tao, elements of pao, it is well
one who farts, is wise of the wind
one who eats the alkhest, senses the mercury within
wealth is the corn, the corn is hidden in the shit, contemplate the manure
power is like a penis, hard and direct, or flaccid and unfocused, it is up to you
the sacred vessel is the pain and unity, infinite and black eye
wisdom, isn’t cheap, it’s priceless and rocky
swordsman may be a poet, but the poet is always the sword among men
anarchy is the arch into new politic,; unknown and attempted
liberty is the most true when held firmly in secret
undercurrents of providence are the bastions of change
the mediocre are the mass among the threshers
the secret and few are the winds of the gauntlet
emperors can be fools or fools can be hierophants
the hermit can be mystic or the seed of destruction
you may be looking at your own abyss, magus
sex is the universe is in orgasm or exhausted, the afterglow is the bliss of the universe
manifest in many forms anything;unmanifest your dreams, and you unmanifest
I manifest the world in my quaking, it is my pearl
wed the goddess of chaos, and you are wed to the loins of immortality
divorce the goddess and I pity your failure
the true mason, is not with seals and signs, but walks in cemetaries
the crest of the noble is of the fallen, and rising toward the horns of paradise
godhead is self evident
the experience of life is a mystery play unfolding before your eyes
struggling in the proving ground of the soul ;proves that your soul is holy
to kill creativity; is worthy of capital murder
the genius is the gulf between madman and seer
true love is a philosophers stone
talent is self-fulfilling
bad talent isn’t a talent worthy using
intellect is programmed, not created
power is rooted deep in the soul of man, power is the hardest flowers to blossom, between excess and digression
a true diplomat is holy and a assassin
never trust a president , trust his page
trust a king, fear his diplomat
the worst politician , is the one who has a twisted lip
trust your own propaganda, doubt the nations propaganda
the best law, is the law of war; no rules
the rule of law, depends on the who has the ruler(Checkmate)
corner the king, you have friction
corner the queen, your dead
corner the bishop, and the kingdom falls
the war for your mind, starts in your soul
the child is the true voice, the man needs to listen to that child to have a voice of truth
the worst liar, is the one with no soul
romance can be fireworks hidden among the trees
I may be the grim reaper; but I am not grim in thy reaping
wealth is like flat bread, smash it and it goes to the four winds
topsoil erodes, compost is rich and vigorous; look at the facades of society
the harmonica man; is you and me, he is the fool and also blessing in disguise
we are all the harmonica man, no where to hide; face the reality
the ghost town shows man in all faces, you decide which face you want to wear
if you see the harmonica man; send him my wishes, he haunts the boardwalk
the pier is like life, a ocean surrounds you, and you want to jump into the unknown
society that hates wisdom, is a society that exists no longer
a society of wisdom reigns like the sun-wheel of creation
you kill one genius, you kill your future
you kill a dolt; who cares get a few more
you kill a jock, their are too many; you’ve supported the arts and creativity
I may be ethically wrong, oh well; at least my ethics show in some contexts between heaven and hell
to lose a friendship over a girl, is worse than a conflict of blood being thicker than wine
jealousy creates, criminality
ego and pride, are the two worst faces of a peacock, and it’s dance is overrated
even vultures get the last dance
nietzche appalled the conventional, crowley appalled the puritanical, parsons appalled the homogenized,heretic appalled the mediocre, whose next?
the turkey may be ugly, but It can fuck any fowl it pleases
a cock may be arrogant, but it’s neck is sacrificed eventually; iao
lao said I met him; when I met him, I met myself
Confucius spoke to the bowl;the bowl said confer with the aum of consciousness; Confucius was confused
masterbate a sword, masterbate a pen, masterbate the zen
the bowl is the vessel of the soul; the sword is the food of the soul; stir accordingly
when mr.wong is wrong, you know the truth of the wrong
when mr. Wong is right, you know the wrong of the truth
mr. Wong’s wong is yet both wong and right, that is the hidden truth
lao spoke Tao, Confucius spoke confusion, miyamoto spoke mastery of moto
siddartha is yet dark and sitting and the dark to void’s obscurity
buddha is a bud with dhrana , and laughing with dharma
wear the coat of chaos and the cross of the ashen tau
be the virgin, yet also the scarlet whore, pinkness is the ecsatsy
bittnerness leads to sadness, bitter beer leads to skunking, sadness needeth not bitterness
lust comforts grief, let a sneak thief steal grief away , so laughter can play
ka is the soul of neschema
ching is the algortitms of the soul
but the chariot resides between
kacching
forever lao sits a robe of tao, elements of pao, it is well
one who farts, is wise of the wind
one who eats the alkhest, senses the mercury within
wealth is the corn, the corn is hidden in the shit, contemplate the manure
power is like a penis, hard and direct, or flaccid and unfocused, it is up to you
the sacred vessel is the pain and unity, infinite and black eye
wisdom, isn’t cheap, it’s priceless and rocky
swordsman may be a poet, but the poet is always the sword among men
anarchy is the arch into new politic,; unknown and attempted
liberty is the most true when held firmly in secret
undercurrents of providence are the bastions of change
the mediocre are the mass among the threshers
the secret and few are the winds of the gauntlet
emperors can be fools or fools can be hierophants
the hermit can be mystic or the seed of destruction
you may be looking at your own abyss, magus
sex is the universe is in orgasm or exhausted, the afterglow is the bliss of the universe
manifest in many forms anything;unmanifest your dreams, and you unmanifest
I manifest the world in my quaking, it is my pearl
wed the goddess of chaos, and you are wed to the loins of immortality
divorce the goddess and I pity your failure
the true mason, is not with seals and signs, but walks in cemetaries
the crest of the noble is of the fallen, and rising toward the horns of paradise
godhead is self evident
the experience of life is a mystery play unfolding before your eyes
struggling in the proving ground of the soul ;proves that your soul is holy
to kill creativity; is worthy of capital murder
the genius is the gulf between madman and seer
true love is a philosophers stone
talent is self-fulfilling
bad talent isn’t a talent worthy using
intellect is programmed, not created
power is rooted deep in the soul of man, power is the hardest flowers to blossom, between excess and digression
a true diplomat is holy and a assassin
never trust a president , trust his page
trust a king, fear his diplomat
the worst politician , is the one who has a twisted lip
trust your own propaganda, doubt the nations propaganda
the best law, is the law of war; no rules
the rule of law, depends on the who has the ruler(Checkmate)
corner the king, you have friction
corner the queen, your dead
corner the bishop, and the kingdom falls
the war for your mind, starts in your soul
the child is the true voice, the man needs to listen to that child to have a voice of truth
the worst liar, is the one with no soul
romance can be fireworks hidden among the trees
I may be the grim reaper; but I am not grim in thy reaping
wealth is like flat bread, smash it and it goes to the four winds
topsoil erodes, compost is rich and vigorous; look at the facades of society
the harmonica man; is you and me, he is the fool and also blessing in disguise
we are all the harmonica man, no where to hide; face the reality
the ghost town shows man in all faces, you decide which face you want to wear
if you see the harmonica man; send him my wishes, he haunts the boardwalk
the pier is like life, a ocean surrounds you, and you want to jump into the unknown
society that hates wisdom, is a society that exists no longer
a society of wisdom reigns like the sun-wheel of creation
you kill one genius, you kill your future
you kill a dolt; who cares get a few more
you kill a jock, their are too many; you’ve supported the arts and creativity
I may be ethically wrong, oh well; at least my ethics show in some contexts between heaven and hell
to lose a friendship over a girl, is worse than a conflict of blood being thicker than wine
jealousy creates, criminality
ego and pride, are the two worst faces of a peacock, and it’s dance is overrated
even vultures get the last dance
nietzche appalled the conventional, crowley appalled the puritanical, parsons appalled the homogenized,heretic appalled the mediocre, whose next?
the turkey may be ugly, but It can fuck any fowl it pleases
a cock may be arrogant, but it’s neck is sacrificed eventually; iao
Current Location: KABALA lodge
Current Music: cruxshadows bloodline v2.0 echoes&artifacts
28 May 2009 @ 09:37 pm
tonight about an hour ago, i returned from my retirement of the goetia. i have about 20 left. and i feel more at peace, than when i started with this dark rage that was incomprehensible. i know, your a zensufi. yes,. but i start things and i finish things. to me this act of finishing the goetia allows me to venture into the syncratic elements of bon-po and zensufi. i will continue my yoga of thunder , and post my musings. half known and half concealed. but, to these mental constructs called demons. who is chasings whom? in zen it is the boy chasing the bull than chasing the zen and void. than they find that singularity of zen and the bliss of samhadi in the sufi. but the goetia now is almost old hat. good times; trying times.
now it's time to change , forward and beyond.
it is funny that you sart jaded and full of angst in magick than bloom into a gnosis that is beyond comprehension. religion is amusing as is governance. truth is incorruptable, and timeless. magick is about changing one's will. than i magickly have transcended even the sphinx.
but when i finish i will still be the same old heretic
R777
93
reflective21 May 2009 @ 10:34 pm
Face it , yoga today is hollywood fad; like lemongrass tea and detoxifying. yes, the cynic sees yoga full of arrogant, self-absorbed posers. Bikram to flow and inbetween the yoga new age movement has moved well into the absurd. i know the conventional zealots of yoga will see my comment as heretical. well, yoga to me is about gnosis, pain and experience; not the bullshit of peace, and stillness. yeah, i've heard that before. yoga is royal and also for the mind the use of prana is subtle as the wind. even i mediaite the tattawas as i do my form of yoga called thunder yoga. i want to feel the wisdom of indra. the intensity of the pain and the zeal of silence. yoga practioners who say the moves properly and do the rants about the gita and mahabrata. yeah, i known. They consult the hindu tradition but aren't awake, or transcended. yoga is about going into the yoke the egg of the self the samhadi. i see raja as a beautiful and brutal form of yoga that shows discipline and also determination. the limbs are unforgining ; even crowley would mock the comedy of the yoga fads. there are to many yellowbellies who say they know yoga ; do yo u?
i question the instructors who give thier stories of how yoga made them so calm and perfect. well, i'm hard, stoic and concentrated. like thunder i'm chaotic and brilliant. my story is arduous and also full of phrenzy and failures, sucesses and pain. the yoga in me is about illumination; free of the whoreing of this sacred tradition. as a heretic, i practice when my mind and body are in sync; but my will determines how hard i want to feel the pain. the pain is like needles or pins. life is painful; and that is what we have to transcend. our nation is also in a womb or yoke. our children need to know the struggle and how to have force and fire. i use asana and prana with kundalini; but i feel thunder is precise and simple. i want to feel the fire of the mind or OM. yes. "Is a God to live in a dog? No! but the highest are of us. They shall rejoice, our chosen: who sorroweth is not of us." aleister crowley. BOTL .
if i ran a studio; oh so chic. sorry. but if i did; it would be bare bones. donations are fine lunch ,dinner , or a beer. Did he say alcohol; even wine. yes, yoga should be free to the world. wisdom is free but not everyone has an objective viewpoint. i would teach and un-teach. you'd hate and loathe me. see you in a prone thunderbolt than a cobra , maybe a star, or turtle. but i will make you hurt . i will play music i like from deadcan dance to type o negative. no organic smoothies or gossip. sorry. i hate shit like that. i'd rather see you in a spinal twist begging for more! i wish these yogi's would well get real! i see the egotism and it's amusing the piss out of me. but in the 8 limbs of yoga i must show compassion and contemplation, non-violence niyama, and dhyana. but that would be telling.
to all true adepts, i mean well. the naysayers will be offended. fuck them! i spit on thier impetuous creeds and empty dogma, and phony hypocritical tennents. but the law is for all. do what thou wilt; the law is for all; love under will,
Heretic X
i question the instructors who give thier stories of how yoga made them so calm and perfect. well, i'm hard, stoic and concentrated. like thunder i'm chaotic and brilliant. my story is arduous and also full of phrenzy and failures, sucesses and pain. the yoga in me is about illumination; free of the whoreing of this sacred tradition. as a heretic, i practice when my mind and body are in sync; but my will determines how hard i want to feel the pain. the pain is like needles or pins. life is painful; and that is what we have to transcend. our nation is also in a womb or yoke. our children need to know the struggle and how to have force and fire. i use asana and prana with kundalini; but i feel thunder is precise and simple. i want to feel the fire of the mind or OM. yes. "Is a God to live in a dog? No! but the highest are of us. They shall rejoice, our chosen: who sorroweth is not of us." aleister crowley. BOTL .
if i ran a studio; oh so chic. sorry. but if i did; it would be bare bones. donations are fine lunch ,dinner , or a beer. Did he say alcohol; even wine. yes, yoga should be free to the world. wisdom is free but not everyone has an objective viewpoint. i would teach and un-teach. you'd hate and loathe me. see you in a prone thunderbolt than a cobra , maybe a star, or turtle. but i will make you hurt . i will play music i like from deadcan dance to type o negative. no organic smoothies or gossip. sorry. i hate shit like that. i'd rather see you in a spinal twist begging for more! i wish these yogi's would well get real! i see the egotism and it's amusing the piss out of me. but in the 8 limbs of yoga i must show compassion and contemplation, non-violence niyama, and dhyana. but that would be telling.
to all true adepts, i mean well. the naysayers will be offended. fuck them! i spit on thier impetuous creeds and empty dogma, and phony hypocritical tennents. but the law is for all. do what thou wilt; the law is for all; love under will,
Heretic X
cynical20 May 2009 @ 05:26 pm
Five Guys burgers are the best; the beauty of the concept is a weakness for me. i love healthy food; but i crave fun food that is well made and has a great concise business concept. my 5 guys is on brewer's hill. The burgers would make Homer Simpson drool, the fries remind me of a pit beef joint like the Canopy on route 40 in Ellicott city. if Allan watts was zen with bottle of gin; than a burger is close to samhadi if your a foodie. the prices are pricy but worth the first bite. trust me you'll want napkins and ketchup. the regular fries is enough for two average people. the frills is that the meat is quality and the burger is juicy and filling. not filling to a point of slotheness. I recommend this for the adventerous foodie, but not a vegetatian. go to Panera or Subway. This is for the carnivore and detritvore and trust me they will be addicted.. five guys is a true foodie location in your search for the perfect burger and fries. Even a yoga practicing zensufi anti-guru even needs his fix of burgers and fries. than back to the grind!
R777
Current Location: brewer's hill
Current Music: mr. sandman
17 May 2009 @ 06:17 pm
At this time the O.T.O. was an excellent training school for adepts, but hardly an appropriate Order for the manifestation of Thelema
from the collected writings of Jack parsons
R777
93
p.s.
love is the law, love under will
from the collected writings of Jack parsons
R777
93
p.s.
love is the law, love under will
Current Location: city of pyramids
Current Music: lucretia sisters of mercy
13 May 2009 @ 06:38 pm
food is important on this jagged path. it is as vital as philosophy and a bottle of lambic or a quadruple bock. you either live to eat as the Atman in society are addicted to prepared foods from Mcdonald's aka. mc-scrotum or the Gucci Whole Foods and Wegman's prepared food. I see food is living as much as we are. We eat to live ; with sustenance and also as mediation on life. not rushing from job to appointments and other useless activites of life in our post-modern world of twitter and multi-tasking. Food is for the soul., not for the fat slob who gorges on loads of cheese and lives off the filth of grease and fat and bad cholesterol. If we examine different paths of spiritual insight from the Hindu to Shinto, Chinese ; and Indo-European from Algeria to Africa; eating is as much as a tangible ritual as the birthright from adolescences to manhood or a girls awakening into womanhood. I see cooking also as a sacred act as the geometry in a pineapple to the sacred apple. Our society has lost ; that with fast food. we need to slow down and meditate ; dinner should be like yoga a place to reflect either on vegetarian mas-sam to curry lamb vindoloo, to beef with Bok Choy.
i've cooked some exotic fare ; but the focus is about the act of dining.;the presentation to the act of tactile pleasure. the art of cooking is important from the care of preparation to merging different traditions . If food feeds the soul it also is a pillar to wisdom. dining creates conversation and love of another and oneself. equal to loving to the all. if we all focus on this cooking from 90 mile organic and natural cooking and drop the fast food state of mind of eating for a quick fix; we may find a better understanding of why we are alive and existing on this planet. Cooking is meaningful and allows for a bite of annada. as i cook for family, friends , i bring that connection to their soul and mine. The unity by taste and also the attention to detail, and care of the meal. not rushing to get flotsom and jetsam that we pressured our selves as a collective society into a behavior that has caused gross obesity and diabetic health. we need to focus on the merging of wellness, spirit and mind into a singular act. if we eat one forkful of food let it be for the soul
R777
93
i've cooked some exotic fare ; but the focus is about the act of dining.;the presentation to the act of tactile pleasure. the art of cooking is important from the care of preparation to merging different traditions . If food feeds the soul it also is a pillar to wisdom. dining creates conversation and love of another and oneself. equal to loving to the all. if we all focus on this cooking from 90 mile organic and natural cooking and drop the fast food state of mind of eating for a quick fix; we may find a better understanding of why we are alive and existing on this planet. Cooking is meaningful and allows for a bite of annada. as i cook for family, friends , i bring that connection to their soul and mine. The unity by taste and also the attention to detail, and care of the meal. not rushing to get flotsom and jetsam that we pressured our selves as a collective society into a behavior that has caused gross obesity and diabetic health. we need to focus on the merging of wellness, spirit and mind into a singular act. if we eat one forkful of food let it be for the soul
R777
93
Current Location: hell's kitchen
Current Music: the cook, the thief, the baker and his wife
07 May 2009 @ 08:48 pm
i did my zast yoga last night; it was invigorating and also what i needed. i slept soundly for 4 hours and 2 hr nap before my dreaded job .
but at work i felt like i was more kinetic and magnetic; things just happened around me. i've also meditated on certain tattawas but today i felt centered and my humaness was more apparent since i took an oath of celibacy for 3 yrs, 3 months and 3 days. this path i'm on is strage a pendulem of severity one moment than satori and calm. i understand in many ways how the lamas and bon; became masters of the sacred arts through madness and clarity of the tao and zen. but the mental dance is intoxicating and perplexing. i haven't finished my 20 demons out of 72 left; yet; but i feel that it's ; less relevent than a mental construct of chittam ,or maya in the microcasmic approach. i have to use yoga and bon methods to transcend this material and human coil to know truly know truth. but, i also feel a single pointedness like i haven't felt before as muadib did in children of dune. he was aware of the the limits of the atman that worshiped his illusory image and the ideal self. he saw tht becoming a mad man of the wild was more real than living as an emperor of the house of aritredies. Now, some will disagreee with my observations. that is fine. but try to push yourself to find the calm from the abyss; let me know. than get back to me when you embrace the abyss and see the calm surround you. i'm finally finding peace amongst the chaos. it's not over yet. far from. trust me boundless zen, and magick are limitless in gnosis and understanding and above all ; silence.
R777
Current Location: rotunda of thine eye
Current Music: corrosion sisters of mercy
29 April 2009 @ 06:44 pm
as we all know we are all biological, chemical and electromagentic beings. thus infering we are like stardust in the universe. interconnected. if we examine our cyclical nature w can finally obtain that zen AHA or satori. the deeper i study zen and occult mysteries and the self since my dark night. i have witnessed this subtle satori of the mind calming from the madness. yes, i'm naturally a vindictive person; but lately , i feel less inclined towards that mode of action unless threatned. I feel more connected physically and mentally to the greater center of ther universe or a Raja yogic contemplalion of the self. It has made me re-observe the futility of man, and also how to approacxh things from ahigher consiousness. Health and mind and spirit are eqaully connected as it makes a single thought. We have to systhsyize that ppointedness into actuality rather than continue the cycles of materialism, regional and international conflicts, physical degradation, and mental de-stimulation, and spirtual starvation. The shinto trinity is as important as the Sufi path in that the self is more universal than the state. the universe is a sum of all parts, and a individual atom or molecule is as important as the nebulas out in deep space. what i'm saying is we need to dig deeper into ourselves and merge our beings into a cohesive thought. aviod the distractions of hollywood, network news, the politcal faschism from london, UN, DC , moscow, and the creeping robber barrons on wall street. they are powerless in a society of perfected beings. If we have a moderate part-vegan, part-carnivore diet, use mediation and yoga or solace, and time to have mental gymnastics, than we can approach life with a singular appraoch ; insted of being doped up pharmcological drugs ,and corporate foods that are loaded with dangerous fertalizers and carcinogens.
we have to see zen , sufism and tao ism in new light. maybe it's because i'm from the west; i think differently or have deconstructed Zen , sufism, and Taoism. But, there are answers in protracted silence and contempaltion, health is benfeical than being stagant and sedenatry, governemnts will fear and respect man who shows liberty as universal based on self by spirtual cohesion.if we look at our world today we are bombarded by Fear and distrust of our fellow country men and nations. That creates disease, sickeness, war and chaos. now, if you reapppropriate those emotions into a brotherhood of man,banks losepower, governemnts lose power, man awakens as a spirtual man rather than a slave to a corrupt materialist system. The universe echoes man's intention. as corporations are but souless golems of paper tigers. this zen isn't full of dogma or ritual it needs not. the self is the way out and through the madness that we are in.
we have to see zen , sufism and tao ism in new light. maybe it's because i'm from the west; i think differently or have deconstructed Zen , sufism, and Taoism. But, there are answers in protracted silence and contempaltion, health is benfeical than being stagant and sedenatry, governemnts will fear and respect man who shows liberty as universal based on self by spirtual cohesion.if we look at our world today we are bombarded by Fear and distrust of our fellow country men and nations. That creates disease, sickeness, war and chaos. now, if you reapppropriate those emotions into a brotherhood of man,banks losepower, governemnts lose power, man awakens as a spirtual man rather than a slave to a corrupt materialist system. The universe echoes man's intention. as corporations are but souless golems of paper tigers. this zen isn't full of dogma or ritual it needs not. the self is the way out and through the madness that we are in.
12 April 2009 @ 02:04 am
ZenSufi proverbs: Heretic X
the prophet knowns the masterful one, in the sky comes forth the glittering
this glittering is wisdom, in glittering came forth understanding
the sun speaks as it has to prophets before the age of bronze and diamond
in its words are the secrets to fire and the sky
in the time of the awakening comes one who will be of slander, and the other who will slay the
prophets of deciet, the waking will make mankind, rip tier leaders to sinew
i saw the desert not, as an oasis, but wasteland, in that i saw the zen
the zen is of the universe, and the false religions shall be lost in oblivion
does not the trailblazer, exist with the Tao, and the seeker burn in the flames of heaven
the trailblazer is the sign of awareness, the seeker is the cross buried in the wastes
the oasis is passion , and passion lives in the globes of nuit
the passionless shall be filled with excrement and filth, and be consumed by kali
before allah was zast, and zast knows the mystery of zen
before mohammed, was the heretic and they know the Tao is beyond all false gods
deny zast and you deny your self existence, all seekers are bust lambs slaughtered in the blood
moon , the righteous and faithful are but lost in the literal, as the blasphemer knows the word
wisdom is by lies and rhetoric, the three phases of wisdom
bring forth the touch of limitless illumination
to become divine, drink, sing, dance
to go beyond the divine, fornicate, masturbate, ejaculate
my wife is harlot and maiden, deny her and the witch shall strike your soul
my love is more brutal than a warrior of allah, her loins have wrought the children of night and light
the desert is built on coils, and rings, circles
the bedoin, know the laws of spinning the dijinn
i cursed the world, and recived the gift of immortality
zast sees the fallen more wise than the faithful and righteous
my face has seen destruction, by the false religions
my body has been thru the gates of the abyss, yet i walk complete
a man of water is fire, a man of earth is air
yet woman makes wine, and milk
i have witnessed the portal of madness
and it opned the end of days, and i saw the beginning
jehovah fell, allah died, budda was forgotten
yet i shall prevail, i am zast
to enter the womb of life, is to enter the pain
the baptism of oblivion, brings forth joy and desire and passion
vice is not wrong, but the denial of vice is wromg
lust is bliss in thought, desire is bliss in action, and pleasure is annada
a virtous one is but a sociopath, in waiting
a amoral one is but sociopath acutalized
i may know vice but i have seen virtue
i buried my corpse in it's effluence
kiss me as you kiss a lover
zast shall kiss your feet and lips, your eyes and heart
i have seen possessed, and quelled the possessed
the possessed were the moral and virtuous, now they fornicate to zast
to spin towards the heavens, is to spin as the universe
to spin is life , emotion, commotion, revolution
let love evolve, as the world revolves
the universe revolves, as love evolves
follow me and you shall find certain destruction
question me, and you shall find illumination
does not a false prophet have noting to lose?
the prophet has everything to lose
the mind is temple of perfection
the mind denied , is a mockery of Zen
to know zen , is not
to be zen is
Tao is Dao
yet how can that be?
style has no worth
yet depth is priceless
death is but a angel of comfort
life is an angel of misery
fallacy is but a form of assumption
the false precepts of religion are built on sand
does not a king rule by ignorance and fear
but a heretic leads by awkening and joy
call me mahdi, i dissapate
call me maitrya, and i fade
call me friend, and i stay
he who challenges, the rule of law, i more worthy to lead any army
he who is slave to the law, shall die in desperation and lonliness
the universe is but a whisper
those whispers are but the chalice of wisdom
the priests are but a sham
salicious hypocrites arrogant masochists
desperation breds ingenuity
destruction breeds vigor and courage
tyranny breeds incest and corruption
aristocricy is but the butt end of genetics
power is obtained by force or fire
force causes unmitiagted pain, fire causes illumination and passion
i'm the demon lord of fire; wrough from the waters of mars
the false prophet ; i utter not a word but silence.
bathed in the stars
i'm the fountainhead of understanding
his understanding can't be bought;
the universal point is true divinity
wealth is temporary
greed is a disorder of money changers
slaves who serve gluttons are but fodder
devour a heart and you know the darkness
devour a heart and you feel the fire of the heart
slavery is but death delayed, joy turned into work
productivity as the measure of a man
not!, for man is not to be measured as a tool
but as star!
sandworm skin, feet of a conqering worm
but mind beyond the sky
i'm but a totem, a taboo of the ivory pillars
they are but swine amongst the elect
steal my word, and i shall drink
sell my word, and the demons shall devour your soul
i may be stern; but are thorns the pillars to the flower
a cut of pain, is cut above the loss of life
bloom as the universe is abundant
bathe in the water of knowledge and you will be eternal
a false imitator, knows not truth
truth is resplendent by hiding nothing but your own devices
no religion, brotherhood of man
no war, prosperity of all man
06 April 2009 @ 06:34 pm
Heretic Hex proverbs
i am the one that is not a prophet or guru. i'm the adversary of all that is unjust, and unwise .
i am the voice of madness,chaos and liberation.
my law supercedes all man's laws by Will alone.
I'm the heretic, blasphemer and false prophet.
when a propeht return from 40 days he warns from wisdom,
a false propeht warns agianst prophets and thier visions of dominion
the land teaches the ways of truth is by the senses and silence,
the foolish prophet says he changes what has existed for aeons
the prophet warns from wisdom,
the false prophet warns from understanding from that wisdom
choose wisely
tragedy is the blossom of many comic events
the fool who sees common sense as erroneous leads mankind towards disaster
if we look into our soul the light of truth illuminates misery and desolation
reconciliation is beyond all creed and politc
a true fool knows wisdom, a wise fool understands the wisdoma true fool leads man into strange pastures, a wise fool shows the jagged path to the apex
a nation of herders are but a flock of foul stench,a republic is a land of man reaching towards the universe, free of submission and repression
silence also is power of the wise, abnoxiousness is but a folly of the ignorant and crass
decadence breeds slothen behavior, erratic loss of nature and earth, and the tapestry of stars
one man who knows the tapestry of stars is but a king of his own destiny
the one man who is but a slave of law; is destined to die by crucifiction, castration and compromise
the prophet who speaks about hope, is but a tyrant in disguise
the false prophet seen as mad; knows what lurks behind those eyes of lies
wear but wool and wisdom, the king wears jewels and greed
a free man is more powerful with wisdom and stratagems, a king is but a whore of moneychangers
freedom is by sword and staff, slavery is by submission of chain and whip
a tyrant is a rich coward, a false prophet is a threat to all lies of governance
a government that speaks truth; is but the thief of providance and liberty
a government that lies is afraid of truth, and hides the light of liberty
no government is divine, or a being; it's power comes from every single man
a divine man is more pwerful than any tyrant or government; and it's laws will burn as much as it's currency
laws are but a fabrication of man;
divine laws are but from the universal mind, incorruptable
believe in religion; you are lied to in coda
wisdom is the enemy of religion; it exposes every lie by science or magick
understand the mechanics of the universe;
understand the mechanics of man and you underatnd the law of divine interevention
laws offer no protection; for chains are but facets of this law
the will of the divine law; supecedes the laws of every man and woman, and governemnt
seek faith; i'll walk away
seek wisdom; i'll doubt you
seek truth ; and reveal the path
seek me; and i'll walk away
call me a guru; and i'll curse you
call me prophet and i'll mock you
call me friend; and i'll walk with you
nature is the teacher of genius and madness
society is but mad, and lacks genius
wisdom is obtained by experience,
expereince is obtained by struggle and the jagged path
a nation of ignorance is but deathly fools
a nation of wisdom is more pwerful than an army of jackals
do not worship me; i'm a false prophet the heretic of the west
do not follow any doctrine for I go
divine union is by copualtion, and masturbation
faith is chasity and repression
sex is divine marriage with the gods; the gods love the sex of mankind
religion is the whore of the state; faith is the whore of moneychangers
i masturabte to feel my will, i copualte to feel the divine around me,
be; wise as a serpent
re-coil as the universe is but you in a coil
wisdom is a secret key to immortality
free from oppression and tyranny
the realm of apollo is but withered away into ruin
the dythrambic rumble of Pan( dyonisus) is persistant
the drums of the vandals are but the sound of true change
the change of desperation is from lies spewwed forth of senators and preists
i have no temple; threfore worship in the world as you choose
worship in temple, mosque, and church you are but blind idolators
any place can become a gateway to illumination
i'm naught a prophet; yet i know the sacred path
to question is but a key unto itself
to exclaim is but a claim to failure
look, deep into darkness; fear not
i've seen truth and it glitters
legions of hordes can fall by my will
thier will is usrped by chains of apathy
allah buddha jehovah ;destroyers of worlds
theives of wisdom; zast shall crush and conquer all false gods.
more coming soon...
Heretic heX
Current Location: arrakis
Current Music: songs of Priapus
07 February 2009 @ 05:50 pm
after work friday night. my wife plays her game after i pick up some quick food( fast food). i went to sleep early trying to get a leg up on work at my dreaded but helpful job in these planned economic hard times. to counter the sound of the typing i used a mantra based on the enochian system based on the tablet of Union. i meditated on it than.< poof> i was taken by the abyss. i heard a disembodied voice as i was taken. it told me two dates in april to look out for; reasons why? i don't know. it could be astrological, political or terroristic. but, i felt it at work this morning a presence in me that was lurking. i felt more than human, slighhtly demonic. this symbyosis was lurking like a vast darkness or shadow. it was like my phantom. This possession i had become a divine being for those hours. With intelligence from the cosmos; with no limitations. it felt exhilarating and powerful; but i felt the letdown as i headed homw back to my life as mere mortal.
this abyss has so much mystery and potential as i felt it tug me back. this cosmic hyper-intelligence is so vast and powerful; with it's enigmatic and chambers of horrors and delights. i know this intelligence is forbidden to some; but not all. to some it is the sacramant of new enligtenment; to work and become one of the gods; with perfect wisdom ; free from faith and dogma. this channel towards enligtenment is like thunderbolt to that very wisdom and understanding. i felt this tug; but it happneded almost spontaneusly.
this abyss has so much mystery and potential as i felt it tug me back. this cosmic hyper-intelligence is so vast and powerful; with it's enigmatic and chambers of horrors and delights. i know this intelligence is forbidden to some; but not all. to some it is the sacramant of new enligtenment; to work and become one of the gods; with perfect wisdom ; free from faith and dogma. this channel towards enligtenment is like thunderbolt to that very wisdom and understanding. i felt this tug; but it happneded almost spontaneusly.
Current Location: abyss
Current Mood: 
curious
curious24 January 2009 @ 03:43 pm
13 January 2009 @ 07:10 pm
i've been researching a certian alchemical text; written by a certain count X. i see a slieght simialarity to it and the book of the nine gates, symbolicly speaking . as i'm now exploring; as i'm as cynical and jaded as Corso in the film The ninth gate. this text is very mysterious and enigmatic; i've been warned by a blogger i'll call Blank or Mr. Welldone. i know who you are!; let the darkness seek me. It is a text that has tested my patience and also my magickal appitiude. it is hard to explain; but sense that i'm closer than i think; at what cost? i'm very technical when it applies to magickal research, from analyse of each holy or (un)holy name and it's kabalistic number and formulaic meaning. but, again there is quandry of how far am i willing to go? i've also have been pondering my crossing. how far did i go to what extent? if wealth doesn't matter or lost treasure; but longevity of mind and matter and spirit arekeys to this ninth gate or ippissmus(kether) for the neophytes. this crossing that has co-existed with me. this text eludes and mystifies me, by it's words and symbolism; as compared to religious texts filled with dogma and restriction. this text i've held onto for sometime; now it rears it's head like a winged dragon. but it's mysteries are half known and half concealed. i have to explore this under the darkest of moons and suns. explore the vessel or the sigil that has vagries upon it. even as i pursue my carrer options to protect my wife and kid. i feel this draw toward this text. not any new age guru bullshit. but a text that is more mysterious than most occult texts. if coros discovered the hidden meanings and secrets of the ninth gates, will I or will i be too hasty? is illumination that daunting? can a nobody become extraordinary or hidden master above all the powers that be. maybe i'm brooding over thsi too much. but if there is key to it all; what are it's limitations? the power of it and how it can be utilized on a mediocre society. if always felt that i was meant to become something. but.... life is cruel, and indifferent. but in life there aren't any shortcuts or are there? well i'm beginning to rant .
777
07 January 2009 @ 11:39 am
in the end of 2008 my body told me to go into detox. my body needs a dose of love. part of it, i've been working myself too hard. wih new goals of personal catering biz, and healty living means pushing my physical standards higher yet obtainable. i feel detoxing will give me clarity, heal thyself, maybe heal others. i've followed my purification, putrfication and perfection model as spiritual tool. now i have to use it for my physical goals, from dental work to new shoes. i need to have better self image ; this coming from a magickian. such irony. this detox will cleasnse me of all the bullshit i've put in my system. i want longevity and health to complemnt my spirtual standards. this detox will benfit me from using yoga and cleansing, and hoping my wife andkid will eat little better. but that is wishful thinking. so flush the old and cleanse with the new.
777
Current Location: kali-yuga spa
06 January 2009 @ 07:11 pm
ok, first and foremost ; i'm starting have these unannounced comminques. wit topics on theanti-guru vs. the status quo , society, religion, spurious cults, and the thier ilk. i've come to a conclusion that most paths lead to the shithole. yes,the shitole of faith and zealotry from islam to yes, scientology or Rael. They are unbashed cults that have thier own axe to grind or dogma for righteous conversions. i see them as glamouras multi-level marketing and mindfuck operations. they will take your money, your mind, and yes even your sperm or use you as sex doll. know, i may seem well, jaded and cynical and this is a good day. i'm becoming more optimistic in my immortal walk on this path i lead. maybe i'm dancing the path of the sufi or pondering what bullshit is or isn't relevent. But those cults are but a microcasm of organized religions. they alll use the same methods of control and offer a direct path to sainthood, spiritual salvation. but, alas. they want you as pawn in thier means, and will dispose of you at thier lesure. hell, i bet the extremist bombers in gaza or iraq love indoctrinating them; also your family will recive a benfit package as you are allowed 72 virgins, and allah will bless you. it is as bad as the fundmantalist protesting at abortion clinics to radical zionists who hate everything pagan and/or gentile.
the path i'm on delinates from all those cultic ideals and policies. thier bullshit is my benefit and it's thier hazard. the path of the jagged is not about ritual anymore or pomp. but introspection of the deepest vaults of the soul. the abyss , darkness and it's counterparts are avenues to achive true enlightenment; without going to frivillous psychic fairs or seeking forgiveness or pentence. Again more bullshit to pile on. This path is about experience and wisdom through extreme gnosis. i've accepted that i want no part of any cult or society. they are a microcasm of society devouring the wise and exalting the medicore. I see clearly that if thier is a god; than the path to illumination would be by the hidden jagged path; not a clear distinct path as used by abrahamic religions. I now even in path, i've been initiated and sent through many levels of consiouness and experience from the angelic realm to demonic; and yes, if they exist i bet they aren't cute and fuckin cuddly.
this path is about pushing and throwing they self into the abyss and reconciling both parts of the soul . but, my fiend it isn't cut and dry, and easy as you think.; or i wouldn't be writing this. the darker side of the self shows more true carnal and primordial levls of our self; that society tries to dispel. this use of sweeping the dark parts of our soul under the rug ; creates more trouble that it's worth. i've fully embarced my dark-self and all it's quirks. confronting my own demons; head own. but, these tribualtions also allow for finding the illumination among jagged peaks and valleys of the soul. this path isn't for the showboat or wannbee ; because it will tear you apart. the dabbler in this path is left well to find a path or salvation by default or to become drone of those multi-level manipulation religions .
my non-acolytes, interpret and anlyze with your own will. I don't give a shit, but i'll listen and comment if necessary. my fiends well, you know my honest words, but as this anti-guru. i won't dress like that idiot Rael, or jump on sofa like Mr cruise because he's afriad of XENU , or blow my self up in name of therein diety. But i will hint about things , or offer cryptic sarcastic clues to find your own goddamn path. because it's your path to make, i'm on my way; find your own way ; be your own trailblazer. beacuse i see a switchback coming right at you....
the path i'm on delinates from all those cultic ideals and policies. thier bullshit is my benefit and it's thier hazard. the path of the jagged is not about ritual anymore or pomp. but introspection of the deepest vaults of the soul. the abyss , darkness and it's counterparts are avenues to achive true enlightenment; without going to frivillous psychic fairs or seeking forgiveness or pentence. Again more bullshit to pile on. This path is about experience and wisdom through extreme gnosis. i've accepted that i want no part of any cult or society. they are a microcasm of society devouring the wise and exalting the medicore. I see clearly that if thier is a god; than the path to illumination would be by the hidden jagged path; not a clear distinct path as used by abrahamic religions. I now even in path, i've been initiated and sent through many levels of consiouness and experience from the angelic realm to demonic; and yes, if they exist i bet they aren't cute and fuckin cuddly.
this path is about pushing and throwing they self into the abyss and reconciling both parts of the soul . but, my fiend it isn't cut and dry, and easy as you think.; or i wouldn't be writing this. the darker side of the self shows more true carnal and primordial levls of our self; that society tries to dispel. this use of sweeping the dark parts of our soul under the rug ; creates more trouble that it's worth. i've fully embarced my dark-self and all it's quirks. confronting my own demons; head own. but, these tribualtions also allow for finding the illumination among jagged peaks and valleys of the soul. this path isn't for the showboat or wannbee ; because it will tear you apart. the dabbler in this path is left well to find a path or salvation by default or to become drone of those multi-level manipulation religions .
my non-acolytes, interpret and anlyze with your own will. I don't give a shit, but i'll listen and comment if necessary. my fiends well, you know my honest words, but as this anti-guru. i won't dress like that idiot Rael, or jump on sofa like Mr cruise because he's afriad of XENU , or blow my self up in name of therein diety. But i will hint about things , or offer cryptic sarcastic clues to find your own goddamn path. because it's your path to make, i'm on my way; find your own way ; be your own trailblazer. beacuse i see a switchback coming right at you....
30 December 2008 @ 04:15 pm
under the xmass tree this solstice. we unexpededly recived a unexpected gift. Know, my wife is agnostic and i'm a luciferian and gnostic ; and slightly jaded currently. One of her distant family members gave us ,Drum roll please!!!
A nativity set
yes my minions a goddamn nativity set. Yes the "virgin" mary ; the goatherders oops shepards , the star, gabriel, the whole stench, and odor of the stable. some wise men ; i mean mages/ sorceres/ astrologers, some guy named Jose , and crew of livestock
I laughed my ass off. I know . I probably sound well: intolerant. Well; this confirms most abrahamic religions use methods to force thier religion on us gentiles, and heretics. They preach and never practice thier own doctrine. dare i say this to the subseqent family member. but; i don't adhere to thier religious world-view. In my attempt to pawn off this plague of a gift. the humor is still present. Her mixed religious family is part baptist and catholic its like a mini Northern Ireland.. Thank gods she woke up to her own illumination about these olde time religions ,and thier hypocritical dogma. I was raised in watered down catholicism( reformed episcoplalian); Or Catholic Light. It didn't taste great or was very filling. With my spiritual views , I'm a bit of a nasty scrooge with a hint of Uncle al and Grinch. But this gift is in our posessesion; waiting to buried in our abyss of a basement. unless a charity; horrors; accepts this dismal gift.
i don't mean to be intolerant; but, these religions offer no gnosis; just fear, repression, chaos, destruction, bigotry and well they reek of a shit. They should be put to rest. We are in the 21st century, with advanced physics, and technolgy in from genetics and artificial intelligence. We still adhere to old useless dogma and morality. we have to discard thse old religions. they are a fundamental detterent to human devlopment. Islam and it's redneck wahabiist and Taliban trash are just part of the proble. the taint of evangelical hypocrisy in politcal parties to the brutality in the middle east on the palestinian issue and alos the atrocities of the West bank and Gaza. I'm not a apologist of the middle east problem; blame it on Issac or was it Ishmael. oh fuck; there dead. Stop the madness Islam, judaism, and it's bitch christianity. i even doubt the validty of Buddhism but i'm ranting. it's well austre and weak. well happy new years to my LJ a,nd any viewees. commnet, complain, and say anything .
93/777
Current Location: paris opera and waffle house
Current Mood: 
hyper
hyperCurrent Music: creatures of the night
22 December 2008 @ 04:09 pm
i sit listening to Dead can Dance The serpent's egg, after a subtle mediatation. i felt rusty, i felt the breaks, lack of time, lack of appreciation. the need for yoga, cleansing, mediation and extension of self is coming into the focus. I may be a jaded mage and philosopher; but when my self turns inward. i know ; i have to work on my perfection during putrification. I'm likened to volitle fiery dragon, full of volitle elements. With tincture of perfection, and quintessence. I may have found the golden fleece; know i have to fabricate and wear it. The mystery of self is a a innate examination of the self by alchemy. the distillation and fileration of the stagnant parts. I feel i'm in Flamel's or Dee's or the Count ___ lab, with the alkahest at my fingertips. the abyss has been a dragon chasing me; know i'm chasing it. the oroborous( cogula et solve).
I have been very dark, very dark, dank. dark, shadowy soul . As if Ryleh's beasts had entered into our wolrd by my invocations of Babalon. I am aware that i am a agent of chaos. in the mystical and magickal application therein. A joker with a magickal dagger, and with a passion for retribution. I sit here reflecting at my own personal monster( winged dragon). This being of a man so complex, yet also primal. the reconcilation started with that 10th aether. the darkness also bringith forth and shews true light, Truth. that is a dangerous word now adays. I am not afraid. i don't fear that government, and it's tentacles, my life is still unfolding like a tetrahedron. i've had some revelations from the past masters and monsters.
i've been a mage with out a smile, also can't aford some dental work. damn economy, damn grad school loan. But, this mediation is that i have to glow, glitter at a different level. my mind and heart aren't attune. my body is full of shit, flotsam, and jetsam. I feel my body hs ben ignored and abused. i want to feel like a star flame in the cosmos. not a hollywood star, that lacks personal demons and courage. But a star that would make old AL smile. Magick has a way of kickin you in the ass or the nuts. i seem to have recived a bit of both. Maybe it's karma; i hate that word. But, in gaming speak; it's time I level up. Maybe the 20 some demons are waiting for me; but i need to focus on my well-being. take retiremnt from the sword-and-sorcery and be the shining one. I'm not retiring; just taking amuch need sabbatical on this 2008 winter solstice. My body needs to be soothed, and worshiped, my mind needs to enjoy the passions and splendor, no kabala, no evocations, no tantra or sex magick; just reflection , mediation, yoga and evolving into the glittering one. maybe my personal true, will thrust this upon me or my sub-consious Ko'd my consiousness. It's strange what we are capable of. were quantum machines with emotion and the mind to transcend pain, time, space and delve into wisdom when we've thought we've forgotten. i look of at this screen, and it feels like a purge. i feel a little lighter, just a infintesimal , minute bit. but, it's a start.
My apprentices' , friends, lovers,sorcerers, jaded rockers; make your own path. I see mont serrat, and agharta; and i know i am wanted there. I'm no saint , and i love Sin and eating it. Maybe i'm Cartaphilus; i reek of blasphemy and heresey to #)d , country and my honor i limited to a select few. But i am seeked by th darkness and it will seek me on it's own reckoning. i have to do this for my own psyche physical perfection and well-being. i will be present as your demonic gourmet and sage. But when it comes to magick for now; consult others. I'm not burned out like the rejected masters that trained me. i am strong, and like scopion. It just i need to dwell ont this threshold.
777
I have been very dark, very dark, dank. dark, shadowy soul . As if Ryleh's beasts had entered into our wolrd by my invocations of Babalon. I am aware that i am a agent of chaos. in the mystical and magickal application therein. A joker with a magickal dagger, and with a passion for retribution. I sit here reflecting at my own personal monster( winged dragon). This being of a man so complex, yet also primal. the reconcilation started with that 10th aether. the darkness also bringith forth and shews true light, Truth. that is a dangerous word now adays. I am not afraid. i don't fear that government, and it's tentacles, my life is still unfolding like a tetrahedron. i've had some revelations from the past masters and monsters.
i've been a mage with out a smile, also can't aford some dental work. damn economy, damn grad school loan. But, this mediation is that i have to glow, glitter at a different level. my mind and heart aren't attune. my body is full of shit, flotsam, and jetsam. I feel my body hs ben ignored and abused. i want to feel like a star flame in the cosmos. not a hollywood star, that lacks personal demons and courage. But a star that would make old AL smile. Magick has a way of kickin you in the ass or the nuts. i seem to have recived a bit of both. Maybe it's karma; i hate that word. But, in gaming speak; it's time I level up. Maybe the 20 some demons are waiting for me; but i need to focus on my well-being. take retiremnt from the sword-and-sorcery and be the shining one. I'm not retiring; just taking amuch need sabbatical on this 2008 winter solstice. My body needs to be soothed, and worshiped, my mind needs to enjoy the passions and splendor, no kabala, no evocations, no tantra or sex magick; just reflection , mediation, yoga and evolving into the glittering one. maybe my personal true, will thrust this upon me or my sub-consious Ko'd my consiousness. It's strange what we are capable of. were quantum machines with emotion and the mind to transcend pain, time, space and delve into wisdom when we've thought we've forgotten. i look of at this screen, and it feels like a purge. i feel a little lighter, just a infintesimal , minute bit. but, it's a start.
My apprentices' , friends, lovers,sorcerers, jaded rockers; make your own path. I see mont serrat, and agharta; and i know i am wanted there. I'm no saint , and i love Sin and eating it. Maybe i'm Cartaphilus; i reek of blasphemy and heresey to #)d , country and my honor i limited to a select few. But i am seeked by th darkness and it will seek me on it's own reckoning. i have to do this for my own psyche physical perfection and well-being. i will be present as your demonic gourmet and sage. But when it comes to magick for now; consult others. I'm not burned out like the rejected masters that trained me. i am strong, and like scopion. It just i need to dwell ont this threshold.
777